Here’s a little rant on how shallow our society can be at times.
“My husband doesn’t want me anymore because he says I’m overweight and not as pretty as I used to be. He wants to be with younger women.” One of my most amazing, brilliant, kind, creative, beautiful clients shared this with me this week. I responded professionally, and did not offer to punch him in the face on her behalf.
I find her to be such an intelligent and remarkable person—a true priestess, wise-woman archetype. This is far more beautiful to me than what her body looks like!!
Whether it’s an unconscious biological need to breed and propagate, or it’s just the desire for the latest shiny object, there will always be the desire for someone younger and prettier. When focused on the external, there will always be someone with a nicer body, a better butt and a cuter face. The grass is always greener… as the saying goes.
But it’s actually a natural part of human evolution to want to mate with another being that is strong, attractive, and intelligent. We can’t get too upset about this, as it is part of how the human race not only survives, but thrives. Survival of the fittest and natural selection aren’t new concepts. They go back to 1859 when Darwin wrote his book On the Origin of Species.
Physical characteristics have always been praised throughout the centuries. However, I think we live in a society that has taken this too far. Almost everything we are fed by the current mass media is about how to appear younger, skinnier, and sexier. Although I know they exist in other parts of the world (Africa, Asia, parts of Europe, etc.), it is hard to find a community or culture that prizes the wisdom and grace of aging in the United States.
In this country, so much value is placed on things that are external and fleeting. We choose fast food, fast cars, and fast looks over things that are truly valuable—such as, maybe the importance of tuning in with, and connecting to, the intrinsic essence of an eternal soul residing in a temporary body, perhaps???
We deem the transient, shiny objects as valuable, often ignoring the true essence of divinity in each other. Then we complain and wonder why our lives feel empty. LOL.
I recently came across this quote on the internet. I don’t know who wrote it but I really like it: “My looks are the least interesting thing about me.” Our bodies are designed to have a beginning, middle, and end. And the body will look different in each of these phases. However, the essence of a person is eternal, immutable, ancient, futurist, timeless, and beautiful beyond words.
I know that for me, personally, I am moving beyond those younger years of needing to look pretty, etc. I feel blessed to be growing older. I feel grateful for the wisdom that grows within me each day. I feel a greater capacity for kindness, and patience, and compassion as I age and understand that we’re all doing the best we can.
As the body fades, our true selves begin to shine. And that is something worthy of investment. If your partner or the people around you do not see how epically beautiful your true self is, you may want to re-evaluate who you are sharing time and space with. It is likely them that is not worthy of you.
You’ve been getting older since the day you were born.
You wished it faster for many a year,
now you wish it would slow down and stop.
But asking your body to stop getting older, is begging for your growth to stop too.
Your growth as a human, as a soul.
For it’s only when you accept how time affects your body, that you can actually reap the benefits of the wisdom it brings with it.
Each line is a lesson learned or a hardship endured.
Those frown lines were once worries which you fought through.
Or perhaps it’s a line of laughter, a wonderful mark to bear.
Each grey hair is a shimmering stripe of life you have earned.
A story you can share with those who need to hear how you survived.
Your tale could be their saving.
Your purpose as a woman is to age my friend,
to grow more wise, more powerful, more beautiful.
Let the world see the beauty time has in store for you.
Trust that you are who you are meant to be now.
You’ve been ‘growing’ older, since the day you were born,
what a wonderful thing.
- Donna Ashworth